July 31st, 2006, 8:36 am
Googling “colposcopy”
Seriously. This is the microscope on a tripod they’ll be checking me out with.
What a fucking wake up call.
A nurse called to let me know my pap smear was abnormal, and that I needed to have a colposcopy asap.
In case I haven’t made it abundantly clear on this blog …
I’m leaving for Europe TOMORROW
I don’t have TIME to have a microscope inserted into my vagina. Nor do I have the MONEY to deal with the potential resulting cancer!
Hello, cancer - sorry I’m not in right now. Maybe you should have called LAST WEEK when I had HEALTH INSURANCE!
Seriously, Mom, don’t worry. I can always seek treatment in Russia!
Nah, really, the ladies were able to fit me in for a quickie microscope session this afternoon. (Christ, I’m going to regret blogging about this if I have some sort of exotic STD.)
As if I wasn’t stressed enough with moving and the trip … now I gotta worry about this. What irony, juxtaposed at the beginning of my Lifetime movie starring Shannen Doherty … a young woman poised on the beginning of a journey discovers terrible news …
Ridiculous.
About the only good thing about this situation is that if I were to develop cancer, CL would pretty much have to pay me to blog about it, and then my mom could relax that I’m not unemployed self-employed any more.
Update
July 31st, 2006 at 8:47 am
Hey, I had an abnormal pap smear a few weeks ago as well, and I’m going to get a colposcopy on Aug. 8th. If they didn’t do a biopsy when you went in then you’re probably in the clear; and even if they did, you’re probably still in the clear, the statistics being what they are.
I’m saying this to myself as much as to you… I know all the facts, and know the chances of it being cancer or anything worth worrying about are low… but as I’m sure you will agree, that doesn’t necessarily do much to stop the worrying. So I’m not going to tell you not to worry, because frankly that’s kind of insulting to hear; of course we’re going to worry, it’s our health! Still, the fact of the matter is the chances of it being anything major are very low. So… take that for whatever it’s worth.
July 31st, 2006 at 9:17 am
Thanks for commenting so quickly, Amber … I go at 2 today, so I guess I’ll know a little more then.
It’s just ridiculous timing - as if I didn’t have enough on my plate right now.
Oh, and the funny thing is, today is my first day not working, so when the phone rang today, I was half-poised to say, “Oh, sorry, I don’t work there anymore.” That would have been a lot more fun to say then, “Hold on, let me find a pen. Can you spell coloscopy for me?”
Good luck with your test - stats being stats, and all …
July 31st, 2006 at 10:10 pm
Well, I hope it’s less invasive than the TSA search (they also use equipment with small sharp teeth I believe).
Seriously though, good luck. And have fun in Europe. Do lots of things we wouldn’t do.
July 31st, 2006 at 10:47 pm
Don’t worry, too much. I’ve had abnormal paps and it is usually nothing other than hormones being what they are those pesky devils. And with with all the stress your under right now - it’s probably that.
(crossing my fingers, legs, arms and others for you)
OX Oli
August 1st, 2006 at 12:26 pm
I’m dying to know how it went!
August 1st, 2006 at 3:08 pm
Greetings. You’re not the Laura Fries I was looking for. But you’re certainly worth reading. I, too, am a un/self employed writer.
I am wishing you the best. I’ll check back.
Steve R.