Paschal’s
Hartsfield Jackson International Airport,
Atlanta GA
404-305-8888

All this time, I never knew: I need a large, salty, slightly dried out piece of ham steak every morning. Yesh. Hartsfield Airport, 6:30 a.m., Easter Sunday: they looked at me a little funny when I asked about beer. So instead of killing my liver, I settled on my arteries. At Paschal’s mislabeled “bar,” $6.35 gets you said ham, which is quite lovely, some onion-y hash browns, which were decent, some really foul egg-like scrambled-esque substance, and a biscuit. Even in the interests of science, I couldn’t make myself order grits. I’m feeling pretty Southern — if by Southern you mean bloated, dead sober and ready for a nap.

p.s. I will be posting this much later, because there are no Internets in Concourse C. Just to let you know, Air Tran; I will not fly with you (beyond my next three scheduled flights with you), due to your tech un-friendly Concourse C. Delta’s Concourse B has a nifty spot called Laptop Lane. And Air Tran? Please instruct your employees not to direct people to the “Relax and Recharge” area at the other end of the terminal — that’s not the Internet. It’s just an electrical outlet. (Say it with me now: that’s electricity, not the Internets.)

p.p.s. Your ‘cashless’ in-flight beer selling policy is a good one, Air Tran. Thank you for accepting Visa.