January 10th, 2006, 11:20 pm

I have a view

Since April, my box springs stood in front of my living room window. The staircase was too narrow, you see, for it to go up to the bedroom; and the living room too small for me to stare at it, so outside it went.

Wrapped securely in moving plastic, it was safe from the elements. I had vague notions of doing something with it, until my kindly neighbor pointed out that the neighborhood alley cats had scratched through the plastic and used it as a territorial pissing pole.

Scented as it was with feral cat urine, the box springs clearly had to go.

But where? How does one transport such a thing? When does one think about such a thing?

And so it sat on the porch since April, until this morning, when my kindly neighbor noted a large item trash truck or something of the nature in the street. He offered to carry it away … and poof! there it went before I was even out of my towel.

So now I have a room with a view.